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Joke of the Day

"After progressively lifting heavier weights, I was finally able to squat 600 pounds. Unfortunately, all that money still weighs less than a kilo."

"Lost my watch at a party once. Saw a guy stepping on it while sexually harassing a girl. I walked up to the dude, punched him straight in the nose. No one does that to a girl, not on my watch."

"Police are on the lookout for a magician dwarf who escaped prison. They're looking for a small medium at large."

"What does snoop doggy dog use to do his laundry? Answer in comments."

"Why did Steve Jobs decline chemotherapy? Because an apple a day keeps the doctor away."

"A chicken walks into a bar He said ""I think I am in the wrong joke..."" Meanwhile, a scientist crosses the road."

"Came out to my parents at Christmas. Later that day my nephew asked to play hide and go seek. Now I'm back in the closet."

"Why did the airplane fall out of the sky? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread"

"Jeb Bush should come out as being gay to get the Jewish vote. Jews have a strong record of listening to flaming bushes."

"A photon checks into a hotel... ...and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage. He says, ""No I'm traveling light."""