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Joke of the Day

"Cop: Know why I stopped u? ""Cuz im going too fast?"" Cop: Yes, slow down. ""But it's been 6 months-"" Cop: U can't move in with her yet."

"why would old man skeletor wait until the 3rd period of the final game to introduce new uniforms to the team you're a stupid old man"

"I wish my penis felt the same way my nose currently does. Because then it too would be raw from having been blown all day."

"What's the difference between testicles and a penis? Wow. I can't believe you don't know this. There is a Vas Deferens between the two."

"Be careful of your thoughts, they may become words at any moment."

"I caught my brother sleeping with my girlfriend... So I decided to get revenge and sleep with his mom."

"Day 20. Still lost at sea. Crew thinks I know how to plot a course with a protractor. I just like making it walk on the map. Pointy Leg Man."

"I really hate it when my gay friends joke about docking... It really gets under my skin."

"My dad annoyed my mom calling her ""Mother of 7"" until the day she called him ""Father of 4""."

"What do you call it when a prayer is answered? A coincidence."