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Joke of the Day

"On a scale of 1 to Canadian bacon, how sad were you when you found out Hamlet wasn't a story about a tiny, baby ham?"

"My son is starting school soon and thinks the other children will pick on him because of his name. I said, ""Don't be silly, Someoneyourownsize, why would anyone pick on you?"""

"Thought I was at a Nicki Minaj concert for 15 min before I realized I was just watching a homeless man yell at a squirrel."

"Did you hear the one about the two guys who voted no? Neither did aye."

"Snapbacks Popular amongst those with brittle bones."

"A police body camera is like Pokemon GO for catching criminals Mostly because it never seems to work properly"

"Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team? She ran away from the ball."

"If a guy remembers the color of your eyes after the first date, chances are... you have small boobs."

"You know when you lie, things can get out of hand very quickly....... For example I heard about a girl who lied to her husband about how she got pregnant and now there is an entire religion."

"The band Europe is rereleasing their greatest hits on records. It's the vinyl countdown."