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Joke of the Day

"How do you turn a fox into an elephant? Marry it!"

"What has 40 teeth and holds a monster at bay? My zipper."

"Did you hear about the shortsighted circumciser? He got the sack."

"I found a wallet today and as a good Christian I thought ""what would Jesus do?"" ... so I turned it into wine."

"My girlfriend recently said that she needs some time and distance... Is she trying to calculate velocity?"

"My mom let the street raise me, which is why the only things I'm really good at are letters, numbers, and talking like Cookie Monster."

"Imagine a place where you can buy everything related to the Sith and the Dark Side It would be called the Darth Mall... ...and everything would be half off"

"Me: But babe, my doctor said I can't have sex after giving birth. Babe: She's 11.."

"I think I might stop cussing and get all religious and shit"

"Have you heard about the collapse of the boxer shorts industry? apparently it was quite brief."