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Joke of the Day

"How did Vladimir Lenin originally get into power? ""This isn't just a campaign, this is a political *revolution!*"""

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"What do you call a python with a great bedside manner ? A snake charmer !"
"Why can't a policeman win a game of pool? Because he always shoots the black one first."
"Strange that the chimney tends to survive a house fire. as a cold reminder of where the fire should have been. -Jimeoin"
"What childhood game are orphans not aloud to play? House."
"Why did the premature ejaculator cross the ro... never mind."
"I patented the time machine But the judge keeps throwing it out based on prior art"
"I met a girl last night with an AOL email address. She also had no idea women could vote and that we have a black president."
"What's a pedophile do on a Saturday night? Netflix and chill-dren."
"Why were the dinosaurs so big? Because Jurassic times call for Jurassic measures"