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Joke of the Day

"Of course this is my real personality. Who the hell would fake THIS?"

"hmmm this cereal is bland, tasteless, boring, flat, flavorless...*checks box* oh, Synonym Toast Crunch"

"This morning I combed my son's hair sideways and to the front then yelled ""you just got Bieber'd!"" He's not talking to me."

"Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause that's as far as I could kick it."

"A prostitute runs out of a chicken coop and says ... ""Well, that's the last time I do *that* for two cocks!"""

"Why are dogs and engineers alike ? They both have intelligent eyes, but neither can talk properly."

"2 Penises rob a bank 2 Penises are busy robbing a bank. All of a sudden a vibrator bursts through the doors. The one penis says to the other: ""Oh fuck! It's RoboCop!'"

"Why do white people own so many pets? Because they cant own blacks"

"TIL: The Flintstones is actually quite controversial in Saudi Arabia, because Dubai really doesn't like it... But Abu Dhabi do!"

"My weightlifting trainer told me the key is ""If it burns, it grows"" So I lit my cock on fire"