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Joke of the Day

"Why do the lawyers for the reindeer say they have to pull Santa's sled? Because they have a claus in their contract."

"My punchlines are like lost baggage... you should get them in a couple of days. - George Watsky"

"How can you tell you are in a math teacher's garden? All the trees have square roots."

"Why is Islam called the religion of peace? After you leave the religion, you rest in peace."

"What's a baker's favorite part of Manhattan? The Lower Yeast Side."

"They said when pigs fly.. But the swine already flu"

"Passport pictures make you look exactly how you feel just before that much needed vacation."

"Forgot to put the salmon in the fridge after dinner so tomorrow for lunch, I'll have the salmon and the shits."

"My stoner neighbors got divorced but it's okay because they got joint custody"

"Women and washing machines What's the difference between a woman and a washing machine? Washing machine doesn't want to cuddle after you drop a load in it."