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Joke of the Day

"It's a good thing Maradona isn't still playing. Who knows what he'd do when the ref sprays that white line on the pitch."

Next Joke
 
"Hell of a way Americans celebrate thanksgiving. ""Turkey shoots down Russian fighter jet"""
"My voicemail greeting: Hey, it's me. Please hang up and text me."
"*hands you a marijuana* ""This one's called Air Bud. It'll make you play basketball. Also it might turn you into a golden retriever."""
"There are two pronunciations for uranus. Ur-anus and Ura-nus I prefer ur-mom"
"A Mocking Bird Knock Knock Who's there? Who's there? Who's there who? Who's there who?"
"You just HAD to let snakes and spiders on the Ark, didn't you Noah? Way to go, man. Way. To. Go."
"2 birds talking to each other I think I need to take a shit. What are you waiting for? A car."
"Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn't say banana ?"
"[1st date] HER: do you like charades? MIME: [thumbs up] HER: well? MIME: [nodding 'yes'] HER: hello? MIME: [shooting self with finger gun]"