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Joke of the Day

"I made a movie about premature ejaculation. But it came out too soon."

"I'll be going to my friend's Halloween party as a trapped Chilean miner unable to go to a friend's Halloween party."

"pregnancy tests should just read ""pregnant"" or ""nope just fat"""

"Friday. The golden child of the weekdays. The superhero of the workweek. The welcome wagon to the weekend. The famous F word we thank God for every week."

"You hear about the guy who's teeth is like a shopping mall There's a big GAP"

"Do you enjoy interacting with people?"" ""Nope"" ""Great, you're hired!"" DMV interview process"

"7: I'm beating you! Me: Ok. 7: I'm way ahead! Me: I see that. 7: I'm gonna win! Me:.... My son on the carousel horse in front of me."

"Boxing is like a dance, a dance where you punch your dance partner until he doesn't want to dance anymore."

"I had an ex-girlfriend who was rather big, and she possessed an unusual talent; she was ambidextrose - she could polish off a box of chocolates with either hand."

"Why is math a scumbag? Because it borrows the one and never gives it back."