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Joke of the Day

"My go-to joke What's blue and fucks grannies? Me in my lucky blue coat! (helps if you say it with a biiiig smile and a little dance)"

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"If there's a sock on my doorknob... It means I'm having sex with the other one."
"I hate how everybody is acting like they love this new pope so much and they're such big fans but probably can't even name 3 of his songs."
"A year ago, I likened Trump to an African dictator. Today, I think I owe African dictators an apology."
"What falls faster from a tree, a leaf or an Emo? The leaf, the Emo is too depressed to go outside. I saw this joke reposted so many times. I figured I'd mix it up a bit."
"I Saw a Huge Seagull Today It was big enough to be a D Gull. But not quite big enough to be an Eagle"
"Me: *lying nude on checkered blanket* Him: ""Where's the food and why are you naked?"" Me: ""Am I doing it wrong? This is my first picnic."""
"I was walking through an arts and crafts shop when I saw a sign saying, ""Glue Sticks."" I thought, ""No shit..."""
"What is worst then the holocaust? 6 million Jews"
"How do you know when your sister is on her period? (NSFW) Your dad's dick tastes like blood."