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Joke of the Day
"What do neutrinos and I have in common? We're always penetrating your mom"
Next Joke
"1. Hide babies all over house. 2. If a kid asks, ""Where do babies come from?"" laugh, ""Where DON'T they come from!"" and open every cabinet."
"Table for six please? ""Is your party coming soon or?"" [Takes 4 turtles and a rat out from coat] I'm going to need booster seats"
"I learned that 17th century French royalty depleted their treasury... I guess you could say they were baroque."
"My son just got a tattoo of a heart, a spade, a club, and a diamond, all without my permission. I guess I'll deal with him later."
"Failed a urine test... took a shit :("
"You are? Follow instructions. Say - Eye Spell-map Say-ness"
"What are some good conversation starter jokes you can think of? Just some light jokes with bit of humor . Nothing too dark."
"Did you hear about the lonely cow that joined a dating website? She was searching for her udder half."
"Accidentally got two shots of hand sanitizer so if you need me I'll be rubbing my hands together for the rest of my life."