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Joke of the Day

"While I appreciate that you're bringing sexy back, if we're not also discussing who took sexy away, we're only enabling future sexy problems"

"It's a good thing Gatorade was invented at the University of Florida and not Florida State University. Because then it would be Seminole fluid."

"If you go to jail for tax evasion, you are living off taxes for not paying taxes."

"Betsy Ross: ""Let's put some happy little stars in a circle on the flag"" Many years later, an heir of hers, Bob, would say something similar"

"I was trying to form a club for eunuchs at my high school... But there weren't enough members."

"3-year-old: Where do people go when they die? Me: Heaven. 3: I don't want to go there. Me: Why not? 3: It's full of dead people."

"If a parsley farmer is sued... can they garnish his wages?"

"Why are so many Italian men named Tony? When they ship them over from the Old Country, they stamp ""To N.Y."" on them..."

"How much crack did Charlie Sheen do? Enough to kill two and a half men"

"Alexa, tell me a dirty joke The patron tells the waiter ""this coffee tastes like mud"". The waiter replies ""yes sir, it is fresh ground""."