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Joke of the Day

"If a cop busts you with a prostitute, slip an engagement ring on her finger & be like ""Joke's on you, bro; we're in love!"""

"What does Ronda Rousey's opponents and myself have in common? We both barely last 14 seconds and leave our partners underwhelmed."

"How can anyone focus on world peace when we can't even get everyone to use the same date format?"

"Why did the chicken cross the ""net"" ? It wanted to get to the other site !"

"If I was a serial killer my name would be ""The suspense"" So my victims would be like ""oh no, the suspense is killing me"" And then we would both laugh right before I kill them."

"What do you call a one legged female pirate? ARRRRlene..."

"What did 1 volcano say to another volcano? That ash."

"Your mom must study Reverse-Judo. She keeps throwing herself at bad men."

"I sent ten puns to an online contest... I was hoping at least one would win a prize but no pun in ten did."

"Son: can I get lunch money Dad: I have a boyfriend"