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Joke of the Day

"Eli5 What is it like being six."

"Q: How can you tell Bill Clinton from a bunch of dead bodies? A: He's the stiff one."

"Never trust an atom... They make up everything."

"Me: *being hauled on a stretcher into an ambulance* Shotgun! EMT: dude your gonna die if you si- Driver: dammit Dave, he called shotgun"

"bought a box of 100 crickets from the pet store and released them back into the ocean were they belong"

"There was two people in the bus I wasn't the one who farted"

"My go-to joke What's blue and fucks grannies? Me in my lucky blue coat! (helps if you say it with a biiiig smile and a little dance)"

"The past, present, and future walked into a bar... It was tense."

"There's a new type of broom out, it's sweeping the nation."

"A sniper looks over a large crowd of people from his hidden perch. Over his earpiece, he is told to fire at will. He carefully spots his target, and shoots. ""Crap, that wasn't Will."""