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Joke of the Day
"What do you get if you divide the circumference of a pumpkin by its diameter? pumpkin pi"
Next Joke
"Im having a problem in Call Of Duty, I go to the menu and... alright by now the girls have stopped reading this, anyone know any good porn sites?"
"This summer I'm going to go to the beach and bury metal objects that say, 'Get a life' on them. Demetri Martin"
"Your're a redneck if..."
"Therapist: what's your problem today? Me: I have this constant eye roll. Therapist: stop reading your own tweets."
"History Of The Hipster Culture That You Probably Never Heard Of, But Whatever #futurecollegeclass"
"I told my kids I'd rather they ""pull the plug"" than let me live in a vegetative state dependent on machines. So they hid my phone charger."
"When I first got my puppy I called him Barky Bark. Now he's grown up, so he's just Bark Wahlberg."
"Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton are in a plane crash. Who survives? America."
"I was waiting for my wife to try on clothes & spoke to this woman for almost 20 minutes until I looked up & noticed her head was missing."