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Joke of the Day

"Subway Guy: Enjoy your sandwich Me: You too! Subway Guy: Me: Me: *gives him my sandwich* this is yours now"

"Did you hear the one about the statistician? Probably"

"You'd think Bowser would start locking the front door of his castle after the first time Mario just walked right in like he owned the joint."

"Did you hear that Willy Nelson died? He was singing on the road again."

"You are living, you occupy space and you have mass. You know what that means... You matter!"

"I invented the sandal for people with one leg. It was a flop."

"One time I was holding this little girl's hand walking through the woods at night. She said: ""I'm scared!"" I said:"" Well then how do you think I feel? I gotta walk back alone!"""

"What's the difference between anal sex and oral sex? Oral sex makes your whole day. Anal sex makes your hole weak."

"How Do We Know That Adam Wasn't Black? Have you ever tried to take a rib from a black man?"

"My manager at the millinery has a really short temper I mean he gets really angry at the drop of a hat!"