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Joke of the Day

"What a pirate's favorite letter of the alphabet? None of them. Historians suggest that most pirates would have been illiterate."

"My dad's the real winner of this election... He passed away last week."

"The moral of ""The Three Little Pigs"" is ""make your house with bricks."" Why are we giving four year olds architectural advice?"

"Paul Walker proves god is real ! Paul Walker was meant to walk, but he took a car and god punished him for not walking. This proves that - Atheist: 0 Theist: 1"

"Did you hear about the starving horse? He was so hungry, he ate himself"

"I almost always wear black. Not because I'm depressed or trying to be all dark, but because I'm single and don't want to separate laundry."

"What do Dallas Cowboys fans do after they win the Super Bowl? They turn off their XBOX and go to bed!"

"I heard OJ Simpson was getting married again. He's gonna take another stab at it."

"When my Internet is down for more than 2 minutes, I assume Western civilization has collapsed so I start looting."

"If whores, witches, ghosts and hobo's show up on my doorstep, I can only assume it's Halloween because our family reunion was in July...."