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Joke of the Day
"I heard OJ Simpson was getting married again. He's gonna take another stab at it."
Next Joke
"my favorite part about magazine interviews with actors are the 3 first paragraphs describing how they entered the hotel and sat down"
"A black guy walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder.. The bartender looks at him and says, ""Wow, that's pretty cool! Where'd you get it?"" The parrot replies, ""In Africa, they're everywhere!"""
"If I had a time machine, sure I'd go back & kill Hitler, but first I'd pick up an ice cold Coca Cola Classic! (sponsored tweet)"
"2 Canadians are walking through the snow... The first one sees a boot in a nearby snowbank and says: ""Look, a boot"" The second one replies: ""About what?"""
"For the record ladies, your insecurities about your bodies is a bigger turn off to guys than your bodies ever could be."
"A man is at the gates of hell. Satan: Your card please, so you may enter. Man: *swipes card* Satan: It's a chip."
"The most complicated thing about women is the way their brains don't make any sense."
"What does a soviet call someone with good vision? Glasnots."
"Every trip to the supermarket is a game of ""Dodge The Indecisive Old People With My Cart."""