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Joke of the Day

"You can tell Tim Horton's is a Canadian franchise, because my donut just apologized for making me fat."

"I live next door to a family of Anorexic Agoraphobics I bet they have some skeletons in the closet."

"How was the Roman Empire cut in half? With a pair of Caesars!"

"I rate the pyramids 9/11 Because the jews did it."

"Mistakenly used yahoo for searching instead of google. It's like someone used google two days ago & is trying to remember the results."

"How many Freudian analysts does it take to change a light bulb? Two. One to change it, and the other to hold the penis. LADDER. I MEANT LADDER."

"noah's google search history: ""wat is arc"" ""why would god want circle segment"" ""arc or ark"" ""how many animals"" ""5,000,000 x 2"" ""is god real"""

"I heard that Auschwitz had to ask people to stop playing Pokemon Go. Which is weird, because they have the same slogan. Gotta catch 'em all."

"canadian bacon is just like regular bacon but with health insurance and a passion for hockey."

"Waiter waiter does the pianist play requests? Yes sir. Then ask him to play tiddlywinks until I've finished my meal."