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Joke of the Day

"Why do Iraqi police officers walk in threes? The first knows how to read the second knows how to write and the third is to keep an eye on the two intellectuals."

"Gene Simmons is giving tongue to a Hamas tunnel. His tongue is so long it comes out at the other end of the tunnel."

"I could never commit suicide I just couldn't live with it..."

"Thanks to Twitter, I can't go anywhere without my mobile. Quick question. Do I take this man to be my lawfully wedded husband?"

"I'm 14 shows into the 1st season of 'Lost' & there are SO many mysteries. I sure hope someone finds out where Sawyer plugs in his flat iron"

"Had a big lunch at Taco Bell. Off to the woods to prove a point."

"What do you call a bunch of phones having sex? A 4G."

"How does a blonde turn a light on after sex? She opens the car door."

"The worst mix of diseases? Alzheimer and diarrhea. You run but you don't remember where."

"After I painted my computer black... Strawpoll would only work 3-5ths of the time"