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Joke of the Day

"Folks, I've thought of a way to save 2016: James Corden and a bus full of celebs singing We Are The World, then the bus goes over a cliff"

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"What did the wife say to the husband? Beats me \_()_/ "
"If you didn't take a selfie at the gym, were you really there?"
"You can tune a guitar... but you can't tuna fish!"
"There's a dog on my street who practices Islam. I don't have a problem with his religion, I just wish he wouldn't wake me up every morning at 5am shouting ""ALLAHU AK-BARK."""
"A pair of jumper cables walks into a bar... The bartender says, ""Alright, I'll serve you, but don't start anything."""
"What comes at the end of every Ray Rice joke? the punchline"
"What did one penis say to the other penis? I just want to belong"
"Interviewer: what's your greatest weakness? Me: I'm always very honest. Interviewer: I don't think that's a weakness. Me: I don't give a fuck what you think."
"Newton's Third Law is wrong: Although it states that for each action, there is an equal and opposite reaction, there is no force equal in reaction to a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick."