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Joke of the Day
"An optician fell into his lens grinder... and made a spectacle of himself."
Next Joke
"What kind of father names their child Adam? A scientist."
"What is the definition of stalking? When two people takes a long, romantic walk on the beach, but only one of them knows about it"
"I'm so hungry I could eat a hor *horse walks by snorting aggressively* ticulturalist *horticulturalist pops up trimming hedge aggressively*"
"how is my dick like a diamond? its the hardest substance on earth, it can't be crushed, and every girl dreams of having it."
"I remember my first time at a mic. ""Cleanup on aisle 5"" & ""Price check-Advil"" were two early bits that really seemed to resonate with folks."
"If you can fold a fitted sheet I'm 99% sure you graduated from Hogwarts."
"Q: Why can't blondes make ice cubes? A: They always forget the recipe."
"Check out this list number 5 is awesome. 1. 2. 3. 4. 5.awesome"
"[Supermarket] Me: QUICK, WHERE IS YOUR FROZEN SECTION Assistant: Aisle 7 Me: GREAT [opens trench coat and 6 penguins fall out] let's go guys"