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Joke of the Day

"Where does Finn buy groceries (Star Wars FE Spoilers) Traitor Joes."

"My grandfather has the heart of a lion... ...and a lifetime ban from the local zoo."

"The Viking God Thor comes to Earth... and spends all weekend shagging a woman with a harelip. On Monday morning he says to her ""I am Thor"". She replies ""you're thor, I can't even pith!"""

"I like to have a glass of water around to make sure there aren't any dinosaurs approaching."

"One time the top popped off my blender when I was making a smoothie. So... Yeah Iceland, I get it."

"What's even harder to find than Bigfoot, UFOs, the Loch Ness Monster, and diamonds in Minecraft? The real download button on Softpedia.com"

"Scary Halloween Joke **Person 1:** Knock knock! **Person 2:** Who's there? **Person 1:** A GHOST!!!"

"Oh you sneaky little bastard! [Link to the joke.](https://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes/comments/3ei9ie/the_best_joke_i_know/)"

"I tried tap dancing once... ... I kept falling in the sink."

"Why do you want to run for President? Because walking wouldn't burn enough calories."