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Joke of the Day
"Boss set out a bowl of hard candy in the break room, so I guess we had our Christmas party today."
Next Joke
"I was redditing while on the toilet when... I almost dropped my phone..... literally scared the shit out of me"
"Don't you hate when somebody gives you the finger in traffic and then you have to follow them home and loosen the lug nuts on their wheels."
"I told a joke to a bunch of guys. They laughed. Now I'm going to prison. For manslaughter."
"A joke about Muhammad [removed]"
"Did you hear about the cannibal who came home late for dinner? All he got was a cold shoulder."
"Jeb! should be called WTC 7 Never reaching the heights of his namesakes, and falling down without being hit by anything."
"So Paul Walker has died.... Bringing to an end the Fast and Furious Saga - they have however, introduced a new series - The Slow and Decomposing too soon?"
"What's the difference between Santa and Tiger Woods? Santa stops after 3 Ho's"
"WIFE: you've had enough ME (eating my 68th breadstick): aw man OLIVE GARDEN MANAGER: let him eat one more lol"