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Joke of the Day

"I like my women like I like my cellphone plan... Free on nights and weekends."

"Why are snakes hard to fool ? They have no legs to pull !"

"Thank you, student loan, for getting me through college. I don't think I can ever repay you ."

"How is a woman like a condom? Both spend more time in your wallet than on your dick."

"The hardest part about being a photographer is deciding which half of my picture to ruin with my giant ugly company watermark."

"This week in Science: MRI technology and thought processing... are a hell of a lot cooler than last week"

"Hey, want to hear a joke? ""Sure"" ""Sex"" ""... I don't get it."" ""Yeah, I know you don't."""

"Why did the mean teacher walk around with her purse open? She'd read there was going to be some change in the weather."

"The way you feel when your phone dies is exactly how Cinderella must have felt at midnight."

"How can you tell when a Canadian is successful? He dies in his LA home at 82."