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Joke of the Day

"Thank you, student loan, for getting me through college. I don't think I can ever repay you ."

"I haven't seen a kid on a leash in a while. I guess parents started releasing them back into the wild."

"muffins So there were these two muffins. They go into the oven and one muffin says to the other ""is it hot in here or is it just me?"" The other muffin says ""HOLY SHIT A TALKING MUFFIN!"""

"Roses are red... Valentine's Day is Crap! I don't have a girlfriend so FAP FAP FAP!"

"A Priest, a Homosexual, and a Pedophile walk into a bar... And he orders a beer."

"What does your girlfriend and my garage have in common? I pull out of both of them."

"I'm trying to get my wife to quit smoking. Maybe I should slow down and use a lubricant."

"Every time I hear a mean joke about being Canadian, I go right to the hospital and get my feelings checked for free."

"You're scared of pedophiles? Grow up."

"Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a pedophile and 6 has children."