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Joke of the Day

"How are the Twin Towers and Gender Similar? There used to be two, now it's offensive to talk about."

"I childproofed the house... but they still get in!"

"Who knows about math and science and is always close by? An engi-near!"

"Five years ago my boss asked me where I wanted to be in five years. I finally know the answer: Not Here"

"TIL 6.7 billion people are the minority By arrogant ignorant Americans."

"Do you like tapes and CDs? Other person: Yes Me: Good, so I can tape my dick to your forehead so you can see these nuts."

"What do you tell a pornstar right before their video to pump them up? Get your head in the game."

"God, designing a toddler: ya know what would be hilarious would be if it has no ability to reason but talks nonstop. Also make it trip a lot"

"What do you get when you cross a tiger and a chicken? Just the tiger"

"If my DVR cuts off the last joke of my favorite sitcom one more time, I swear im gonn... **FREMULON**"