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Joke of the Day
"The year is 2316. Humans have 12ft long arms from centuries of taking selfies."
Next Joke
"I'm not judging you, I'm just trying to guess what medications you're on."
"A buddy had a lawn mower accident and died after getting the ends of his feet cut off. Doctors diagnosed him as lack-toes intolerant"
"Why was afraid of ? Because !"
"A Russian, an Irishman and a Scott walks into a bar.. Just kidding. They never left the bar in the beginning"
"My friend gave me one last gift before he died. It was his EpiPen."
"What is white, 12 inches long, and not a fluorescent light bulb? Nothing."
"I opened a window to let a fly out... and three more flew in, along with five mosquitoes, three ladybugs, a bird, and a Jehovah's Witness."
"How many kids with ADHD does it take to screw in a light bulb? Let's go ride our bikes."
"What do you get by cross-breeding a jehovahs witness and an atheist? Someone who pointlessly knocks on the door."