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Joke of the Day
"What does a Mexican use to cut pizza? Little Caesars"
Next Joke
"If you have one cricket ball in one hand and another cricket ball in your other hand, what would you have? A bloody big cricket."
"Just buckled a bottle of Tito's Vodka into the backseat of my car, so I obviously know what it's like to be a mom."
"Canada has seasons: Almost winter, winter, still winter, and construction."
"We attract people who are reflections of ourselves. So beware of anyone who wants to be with you when you're an emotional wreck."
"What do you call someone who reads in the sun? Well Red."
"What is Robin Williams doing in heaven? Not sure, probably just hanging out."
"A team of scientists have invented a pill for sufferers of Alzheimer's to take daily. They didn't think that through did they?"
"Interviewer: why did you leave your last job? [flashback to me trying to sword fight all the customers at Toys R Us] Me: discrimination"
"Workout Tip: Be paid millions of dollars to star in a superhero movie."