33557

Joke of the Day

"What does Hillary Clinton use to drown the noise of Black Lives Matter protesters? White noise"

"I accidentally dumped white flour on my black labrador... ...now she's a greyhound."

"I knew she was the one the moment she said those three words that took my breath away... ""THAT'S GONNA SMELL!"""

"jared from Subway What's jared's favorite sub? A junior with meatballs!"

"How do cities decide who gets to be in charge of wastewater management? They hold a runoff election."

"I've decided to start my own herb garden. I've got a lot of extra Thyme."

"Why were the Seven Dwarfs kicked out of the bar? Because they were Miners... XD"

"I accidentally inhaled some soap when I was washing my face and then I coughed and no bubbles came out. Cartoons are full of shit."

"[Army Shooting Range] Officer: Are you locked & loaded? Soldiers: YES SIR! Officer: You may fire at will! Soldier Named Will: WTF?"

"Shopping for Melons My wife sent me to the supermarket with a grocery list, but when I unfolded and read it, all it said was ""melons"". I guess it was the honey dew list."