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Joke of the Day
"Virgins everywhere are fucking nowhere."
Next Joke
"Girls are like blackjack... I'm trying to go for 21 but I always hit on 14."
"It's hard to compare Stevie Wonder to Ray Charles They are both just so out of sight"
"Eighteen is too young to get married. You can't even buy alcohol. If you can't drink, how are you going to make your marriage work?"
"Drinking causes memory loss. And then, drinking causes memory loss."
"Pharmacist: Don't take this while driving and make sure you eat- *crushes pill and snorts off the counter* ""Ok"""
"A guy walks into a bar with jumper cables around his neck... Bar tender looks at him and says, ""I guess I'll let you hang out but you better not start anything."""
"Why did the engineer buy a mattress? To sleep under it"
"I think Jennifer Aniston was filmed on a green screen in 2003 and it gets released with a different background and co-star twice a year."
"And then I realized, it's not that I love documentaries. I just love establishing shots of courthouses."