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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground Beef What do you call a cow with 3 legs? Lean Beef What do you call a cow with 2 legs? Your mother"

"Why did the duck fly Because he was high on Quack"

"When it comes to physically abusive relationships... They are hit or miss"

"There are 10 kinds of people in the world.... ...those who understand Binary, and those who don't."

"When your kids are little you're a super hero.When they're teens you're a super villain. After that, your only power is invisibility."

"What's the difference between a saxophone and a chainsaw? You can tune a chainsaw."

"My math text book got recalled We were told it had too many problems"

"Be on the lookout for a armed psychic midget who just robbed a bank and got away....the police now have a SMALL MEDIUM at LARGE!! ba dum dum"

"Friend: Dude, you need to get into her pants. Me: [imagining how soft her leggings would feel over my thighs] YES"

"A father asks his son ""Son, why are you not hanging out with Mark any more?"" ""Would you want to hang out with someone who is drunk and does drugs every day?"" ""Of course not!"" ""Well, neither does he."""