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Joke of the Day

"Saw a picture of Justin Bieber on a horse. It looked as natural as sauerkraut on a bean bag chair."

"A girl has taking home a very handsome guy... ... to spend the night. When he unzips she bursts out: - ""Oh! I've never been with a circumcised guy before"" - ""I'm not. This is just wear n' tear"""

"My online therapist says you can't live your life in fear....He also sells shampoo."

"if someone asks you about yourself say ""OK, sit down, this is going to be a really long story"" then just wander off"

"My friend bought a stone mirror. It reflects poorly on him."

"Why can't an Asian couple have a white child? Because two Wongs don't make a white."

"""What are you doing? Are you writing down everything I'm saying?! IS THIS GONNA BE A SONG?!?!"" -anyone dating Taylor Swift"

"I've been jogging for 6 minutes & there are, literally, 9 vultures circling above me."

"What do you call the act of lying about Penis size? A Phallacy"

"Girl, You're like my mom I ain't gonna fuck my mom you sick fuck"