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Joke of the Day

"So the Disney alligator killed the 2 year old recently. I hope the alligator has a good time with the gorilla."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Balloon ! Balloon who ? Balloon velvet !"

"Doctor: are you sexually active? Me: why, what have you heard?"

"""What would you say is your biggest flaw?"" ""i step in in people's conversations"" ""i was asking *him*"""

"A guy at the DIY store asked if I wanted decking... ...fortunately I managed to get the first punch in."

"Being an HR, whenever I get a new batch of resumes, I always throw half of them in the garbage. I don't want unlucky people working in my department."

"Everyone always pets my pregnant wife's stomach and says 'congratulations' but no one ever rubs my balls and says 'good job'."

"Jokes . . . . I need some jokes to crack my ultra resistant friends, Please Help! P.S I don't care whether they are rude or not."

"Thank you student loans for helping me get through college and for all that you've done for me! I don't know how I'll ever repay you."

"Why Can't I Find Out Anything About This Superb Owl #superbowl"