31446

Joke of the Day

"just when my neighbors think they know me, I sprint across their yard pushing a wheelbarrow full of hair"

"Never eat ice cream while chatting online. Sister: why are you typing so slowly Me: well my other hands busy. She hasnt replied yet."

"What is the difference between a teacher and a train? The teacher says, ""Spit out your gum,"" but a train says, ""Chew chew!"""

"Bad luck today, I have a bout of food poisioning AND I dropped my Galaxy Note 7 in the toilet by mistake :( Talk about explosive diarrhea."

"The best underwear jokes.... are brief."

"How many ants can you fit inside an apartment ? Ten-ants !"

"They offer an Islamic studies course at my university. *I hear it's a blast!*"

"Never let the printer know that you are in a hurry."

"What's the difference between a guitarist and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family of four"

"Accidentally pressed the soap dispenser instead of the toothpaste. Mouth feels clean but I don't think I'll be able to curse today. Shucks."