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Joke of the Day
"What do Kim Kardashian, and my girlfriend have in common? They're both made up."
Next Joke
"I was thinking of getting myself Cryogenically frozen but now I have cold feet"
"Why did the chicken not cross the road? The original joke is childish."
"How do you call your gay friend With a homophone"
"Your honor this man killed my parents and deserves life but could you make sure he has internet access because he retweets me a lot."
"In the trailer for the fourth Transformers movie a guy says ""what the hell is that"" when a Transformer approaches. THE FOURTH MOVIE."
"Me: goodnight moon Moon: It's 6pm Me: I know but I'm tired Moon: I literally just got here"
"What do you call two hobos hitting each other with cardboard? Pillow fight"
"Fuck children, robots are the future"
"Who is that walking up my driveway?! Anxiety in 3...2...1... [knock, knock] *sigh* ""WAIT A SECOND!"" *mumbles* ""I need to find pants."""