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Joke of the Day

"Fuck children, robots are the future"

"I think 50 Cent should run for President in 2020 He's change we can believe in"

"What is 6.9? A great thing ruined by a period."

"What did one math book say to the other math book? We've got a lot of problems."

"My son said, ""Do you ever look at yourself in the mirror and think, 'My life has been a complete failure.'?"" I said, ""Not unless you're standing behind me."""

"First white Muslims in Boston, now a 7'0"" gay black pro athlete. Narrow-minded conservatives everywhere are having a very confusing month."

"Why do they put fences around cemeteries? People are dying to get in."

"So I was reading about the Lucy fossil in National Geographic the other day and I have to admit, she looks kinda sexy... No homo tho."

"Pity Teacher writes down the word 'pity' on the blackboard. Suddenly, I think to myself ""Oh, it's what comes after forty-nine..."""

"Strap-on backwards spells No-parts."