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Joke of the Day

"Did you guys hear about the dyslexic man who went to the toga party? They wouldn't let him in because he showed up dressed as a goat."

"Why do black people always die first in scary movies? Because they never run from nothin but the police"

"Why did the eskimo spend 3 hours arguing with the return counter? Because the warranty is void if the seal is broken."

"""Sorry, her father is a pterodactyl"" - me with the screeching baby in the grocery store."

"Why don't midgets smoke weed? Because they can't get high."

"What did the male titanic say to the female titanic? Nothing he just broke the ice."

"Did you here they opened a pasta joint in hell? They call it Dante's Alfredo!"

"I broke up with my gym We just weren't working out."

"What's the difference between a feminist and a trash bin? The trash gets taken out once a week."

"Everything happens for a reason. Sometimes the reason is you're a dumb ass and you make poor decisions."