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Joke of the Day

"I'm gonna start a company where I drive people around to haunted places. It'll be called Ghost Bus Tours"

"Someone keeps adding soil to my allotment overnight. It's an absolute mystery as to why though. The plot thickens..."

"What do Japanese men do when they have erections? They vote."

"BREAKING NEWS: Wall-Mart is now selling Justin Bieber CDs in the Garden Center. Right next to the Pansies."

"The teacher asked what comes after the number 69... The student replies, ""Mouthwash."""

"How much of a difference is there between the penis and testis? A vas deferens."

"Knock Knock. Who's there? *Doctor* Doctor who? *Actually, it's just ""the doctor"".*"

"No matter what meal it is, always say you had ""brunch"" so people know how much better than them you are."

"How does Donald Trump plan to expel all Muslims from the county? Legalize Uber."

"The bible says any man who lies with a man should be taken out and stoned, so I took all my gay friends out and got them wasted."