3069
Joke of the Day
"Chemist have an unpopular view on alcohol... They say it's a solution."
Next Joke
"Wrong womam or wrong finger? Funny Joke A: Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger? B: Yes I am, I married the wrong woman."
"What does a waffle call his complete existential paradigm shift? His eggo death"
"""Owen, you must hide this baby, at all costs, from Anakin Skywalker."" ""Okay. Should we continue to call him Luke Skywalker?"" ""Seems fine."""
"People are always telling me I look like Hagrid from Harry Potter. I've never seen the movies, but she must be a beautiful gal."
"So sad when gay kids get beat up for their brunch money."
"Me: why do bad things happen to good people? God: *reveals image of me jerking off to April from Ninja Turtles* Me: oh God: *nods solemnly*"
"I asked my dad if I was adopted... He said, ""No, but not from lack of trying."""
"What did the bobby (English policeman) say to the hitchhiker with three heads, no arms and one leg? ""'Ello 'ello 'ello, you look 'armless, 'op in."""
"What happened to the cross-eyed circumcist? She got the sack"