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Joke of the Day

"What's black white red all over and can't go through a revolving door A nun with a spear through her"

"Texting was a great solution to talking. But now replying to texts is exhausting so I'm done with all communication I guess."

"What do you call a gay chickpea? A hummussexual."

"How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them"

"Why was the washing machine laughing? Because it was taking the piss out of the knickers."

"Did you hear about the lawyer selling moonshine from a van outside the courthouse? He was disbarred."

"The Past, Present, and Future walk into a bar... It was tense."

"Good Cop: We want to help you. Just tell us who was with you on the night of August the 15th. Bae Cop: My parents aren't home. Come over."

"I am schizophrenic, AUA"

"Everyone buries their problems in different ways. I bury them alive because killing people is wrong."