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Joke of the Day

"I am schizophrenic, AUA"

"Van Gogh's girlfriend: Oh my love! Why did you cut off your ear?! Van Gogh: pardon?"

"I always give 100% Which is why I was sacked from being an exam marker."

"I think Helen Keller said it best when she said. ."

"I only make good posts when I'm drunk... Today I celebrate 5 years sober"

"A guy asked me out! Well, a guy asked me if I was going to be the same place he is. FINE, my boss called to see if I was coming to work."

"A man walks into a bar.. he got a beer, waited the responsible 1 hour, and drove home."

"My son just referred to a beaver as a ""wood-eater"". So I mulled it over in my mind for a bit and it would seem he's correct on two levels."

"The Great Spam Recycler"

"When I was young I was worried about getting food stuck in my teeth. Now I'm worried about getting my teeth stuck in food."