30307

Joke of the Day

"Her: that's disgusting Me: sorry, I like to poo with the door open sometimes Her: you shouldn't be pooping in the car at all"

"A Nun, a Priest, and a Rabbi walk into a bar... The bartender looks up and says, ""What is this, some kind of joke?"""

"What do you say to a woman that has two black eyes? Nothing! You already told that bitch twice. (Yeah...I know. It's horrible, but I just couldn't help myself.)"

"Life would be more fun if every time we sneezed we lifted off the ground a few feet and came back down in slow motion"

"Sonic the Hedgehog sells his soul to the Devil. Gotta go Faust!"

"Are you a hydroelectric source of power? ...cause dam!"

"What's the difference between a lesbian and a sperm whale? Fifty pounds and a flannel shirt."

"What do you call a cow thats had a hysterectomy? Decaffeinated."

"Did you know that calculus was never taught in southern schools before the 1960s? They didn't believe in integration."

"Spent all day at Legoland with my son during Star Wars weekend. Gushed like a fangirl when I met Darth Vader. He's my Justin Bieber"