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Joke of the Day

"How does a Jewish mother change a lightbulb? ""No, that's all right. I'll just sit here in the dark."""

"How many feminists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just one, you chauvinist asshole!"

"A Christian and an atheist walk into a bar. They proceed to have a few drinks and enjoy each other's company because they're not pretentious dicks."

"There are 170 billion galaxies in the observable universe yet this woman claims this hummus is ""everything"""

"I was so happy when I got my new thesaurus in the mail. But when I opened it, every page was blank! Damn. I have no words to describe how upset I am."

"I usually read this subreddit on a toilet,... ...so that I dont shit my pants."

"My doctor told me I was fat. I said I'd like a second opinion and he said ""you're ugly too"" :-/"

"You may not be aware of it, but NASA conducted an experiment during the Apollo mission days. They launched a collection of cows into orbit on a prototype rocket. It was a herd shot round the world."

"What did the Wife-DNA say to the Husband-DNA? Do these genes make me look fat?"

"I like my women how I like my coffee. Without a penis."