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Joke of the Day

"In order to write a good essay about trees.. ..you'll need to write a good photosynThesis."

"How do you defeat your enemies? Chop off their feet."

"What do you call a folder on FBI's servers that contains all the intel on known child molesters? A Pedo File."

"Whats green, has six legs and if it falls from a tree it will kill you? A snooker table"

"How nice would it be if when you started rubbing yourself a genie came out, finished you off, cleaned you up & left a chocolate chip cookie."

"Why is my ass good. Because I poop out of it and pick up average household items with it"

"Knock, knock Knock knock. Who's there? Europe. Europe who? No you're a poo!"

"Why is Tumblr so odd? Because they can't even."

"While I was watching the prison wall, a little midget starting climbing over it and smirked at me And I thought to myself, ""That's a little condescending""."

"We decided to name our unborn child something that represents where it was conceived. Only 7 more months until baby Uber is born!"