30105

Joke of the Day

"ME: I have chronic pain. It flares up whenever someone challenges my beliefs FRIEND: That's not really how chronic pain works ME: ow owwww"

"Did you know Stalin's penis was the funniest part of his body? It was real commiedick."

"Honestly, I just want to see the bot try to explain this."

"The best advice my parents ever gave me was not to push too hard because that's how Elvis died."

"there was a shooting at the westboro Baptist church recently... the police report over a dozen witnesses, yet for some reason, nobody saw anything."

"Why didn't Edward leave Russia? Cause he was snowden."

"People consider me as God Santa : People consider me as a ""GOD"". Banta : How do you know?? Santa : When I went to the Park today, everybody said,""Oh GOD ! U have came again""."

"the sign at this subway bathroom says employees must wash hands. ive been waiting for them to come wash my hands for an hour. nothing."

"A friend of mine was learning to drive. The problem was he couldn't get the hang of backing the car round corners. His instructor fixed him by using reverse psychology!"

"What do you call a poor pepper farmer? A jalapeno pauper"