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Joke of the Day

"Two midgets are sitting around, bored... When one of them pulls out some weed and asks: ""Wanna get medium?"""

"You can spray tan a baby if you want to, it's not illegal."

"Why do Chinese tourists get disappointed when they visit America? Because when they buy souvenirs they find out they were made in China."

"I shaved all the hair of my girlfriend's cat. Hopefully she takes the hint."

"I spilled skittles down my pants. Do you want to taste the rainbow? #badpickuplines"

"Your so bald your bald"

"A man has three testicles. He goes to the doctor and says, ""Doc, I have one more testicle than you."" The doctor replies, ""Really? You have eight?"""

"I can speak any language. I just don't understand what I'm saying in anything but english."

"Happy World Alzheimer's Day! Or was it yesterday??"

"What's the square root of 69? It's 8 something right?"