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Joke of the Day

"Me: Feel free to name your next kid after me. Coworker: Why would I name my kid ""Giant Douchebag?"""

"I have said it before. I will at it again. If anyone is into wife swapping. I will take a dirtbike or a puppy. Hit me up."

"What do you call a chinese food truck? A Wok in the Park"

"Just burned 2000 calories That's the last time I'll leave brownies in the oven while I nap"

"Have you heard about the midget Klan member? He was a little racist."

"Dangerously attractive guitars get added to the sexy fenders register."

"My credit has gotten so bad... ...that Mastercard started sending me bills in Spanish."

"How many art directors does it take to change a lightbulb? Should it really be a lightbulb?"

"How does an Asian Cowboy say Hello? ""Ni-Hao-dy"""

"I brought a glue gun to a knife fight. Those knives aren't going anywhere."