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Joke of the Day

"Think smoking's ""COOL""? What if I do it in a leather jacket? ""COOL"" now? On a Harley? Still ""COOL""? While I kiss this model? Is that ""COOL""?"

"Do you know how to tell when your girlfriend is getting fat? When she fits in your wife's clothing."

"One guy says to another, ""I feel like a million bucks!"" And the other guy says, ""Me, too! But how can we get it?"" Title."

"How much for that babysitter? Ma'am, that's a roll of duct tape I'll take it!"

"At what age do you have THE talk with your daughter about how she is not the princess of anything and she'll need to get a job. Is it 6?"

"Why did the turkey cross the road Her didn't want to end up near the sides. PS, happy thanksgiving"

"What do you say when you are trying to comfort a grammar nazi? There, their, they're"

"Why did the geologist get divorced? He took his wife for granite."

"[NSFW] How do you get a dog to stop humping your leg? You suck its dick"

"So I was told that torture is 100% effective. They finally admitted to it after 5 hours of waterboarding. I still don't know why they kept lying before it though."