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Joke of the Day

""" Could the cereal your children eat every morning be killing them? Tonite at 11 on abcnews56 we will tell you"" "" After several studies , no. """

"Q: Why do blondes always die before help arrives? A: They always forget the ""11"" in ""9-1-1""."

"rumours - Moishe, when you're not at home, the neighbors are spreading rumors about you! - Oh, when I'm not at home, let them even beat me!"

"Watts a homonym?"

"My friend and I decided to race our Ford Pintos. Mine broke down three miles down the road. I had to walk the rest of the way. I won."

"My drivers license says I'm an organ donor, but jokes on them because I own a piano."

"Have you ever had sex while camping? Its fucking intence."

"Reasons why it's bad that Justin Bieber is retiring: 1. 2. 3. 4. 5."

"A dick has a sad life His hair is a mess, his family is nuts, his next door neighbor is an asshole,his best friend is pussy and his owner beats him habitually.!!"

"I run down a hospital corridor, clutching the mustard dispenser I liberated from the cafeteria. Earlier I had a plan. Now I have mustard."